


I do

by AriaLink



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Fake Marriage, M/M, Romantic Fluff, Weddings
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-16
Updated: 2019-07-16
Packaged: 2020-06-29 08:36:33
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,762
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19826473
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AriaLink/pseuds/AriaLink
Summary: Based on this tweet: https://www.pinterest.com/pin/515521488596678999/text: au where steve and bucky invited tchalla to their fake wedding and he actually wanted to come and now they have to get married fr





	I do

**Author's Note:**

> Dedicated to my good friend Lily, happy belated birthday! You rock! :D

"Uh, Buck?"

"Hm?"

"We might have a problem."

Bucky looked up from his phone. Steve was staring at the piece of paper, brows furrowed and tongue peeking out between his lips ~~he was so fucking cute~~. Shuffling over to get a look for himself, Bucky plopped his chin on Steve's shoulder. He let out a whistle when he saw the extravagant, blocky border of gold foil and thick parchment. Even the paper was fancy when you were dealing with rich people, apparently. The elegant script was no doubt written with a thousand dollar fountain pen, but Bucky couldn't enjoy it when it spelled out those damning words.

_Thank you for your gracious invitation. The Wakandan royal family looks forward to attending the ceremony._

"The fuck?!" This was not how it was supposed to go. Not at all. Nope. This was all kinds of bad. Grab-Steve-before-he-can-do-something-stupid kinds of bad. Pack-up-your-things-and-move-to-Mars-under-a-new-identity kind of bad. There was an infinitesimal flicker of hope in his chest, but Bucky quickly blew it out before it started causing problems. Like a certain guest(s) just did.

"What do we do?" Steve was looking at him with those cornflower blue eyes and Bucky felt like melting into the floor. What _could_ they do? Most people spent months planning a wedding, and Bucky imagined it would take even longer to make one royal-ready. Not to mention the funds. Hell, the whole reason he came up with this scheme was to _make_ money, not spend it.

"We'll just- we have to cancel, obviously," Bucky said.

"On the King and Queen and who knows who else of Wakanda?"

"Well, what choice do we have?"

Steve frowned, glaring at the paper as if he could intimidate it into non-existence. Bucky winced. Yeah, it was kind of a dick move, but then again, staging a fake wedding and inviting the world's billionaires just to get expensive presents was kind of a dick move already. He didn't think it was going to be a big deal to Steve, but maybe he'd miscalculated. Screwed up. Bucky felt prickles of fear roll down his back. What if Steve-

"Ok," Steve said quietly. "We'll cancel the wedding."

\---

The idea had come to him during one of Steve's long and arduous bouts with pneumonia. He was lying on the bright white sheets, half delirious from the medication. Bucky grasped one frail hand with his own, bowing his head and praying with all his heart. He was too used to doing that. He was too used to all of this, the late nights filled to the brim with worry, the harsh sterility of the hospital, the sweat covering Steve's face as he tossed and turned. It showed in the bills too, the budget always looming over their heads like a blood moon.

"Hey, Stevie," he said. No response. "Heh, I'm pretty sure the nurses think we're married, with how much I'm visiting." Still nothing. "Yeah, that was bad." He lapsed into silence, letting Steve's short, wheezing breaths fill the room.

"Maybe we should get married," he continued. "You get wedding presents when you get married, right? It's like, your birthday, but you get to choose when it happens. Oh!" Bucky sat up, an idea sparking in his brain. "Do you remember when Becca got married and invited Tony Stark for shits and giggles? She got one of them- what's it called- Starkmobiles. We should do that too!"

Bucky nodded to himself, the plan forming itself already in his mind's eye. "And we don't-we don't have to get married, just, like, give a fake address for the RSVP or something. Yeah, but not just for Tony Stark, we gotta get a whole buncha rich guys' presents. Let's see, we should get Reed Richards, Norman Osborn..." He snorted. "Do you think Victor Von Doom would get us anything for our wedding?"

"He'd better," a raspy voice called out. Bucky jerked out of his imagination to see Steve turned towards him, a slight smile gracing his lips ~~even sick he looked hot as hell~~.

"Yeah," Bucky said, feeling a smile creep onto his own face. "Yeah, he'd better."

\---

Perhaps it was just his imagination, but Bucky felt something twist uncomfortably inside him when he explained the plan again when Steve was more lucid. Steve had just... wilted.

\---

Bucky was in the middle of drafting the cancellation notice when his Steve-is-doing-something-dangerous radar pinged. Sighing, he got up to go find him when a whirlwind of righteous fury blew into the room and Bucky was faced with all 5'4" of pissed-off Steve, who was nearly vibrating out of his skin with anger. Bucky felt his gaze sliding over Steve's body, checking for blood or dirt or anything out of place, and felt his fear spike higher when he looked just fine.

"We're getting married," Steve snarled.

Bucky blinked. "We- what?"

" _I said, we're getting fucking married._ Which church did you put on the invites?"

Bucky just stared, still bewildered. "... What happened?"

He'd finally figured out, through Steve's almost incomprehensible growling, that Steve had run into some assholes protesting the recent marriage of a lesbian couple at the local church, and now those assholes were somehow invited to their wedding. Bucky felt faint.

"Stevie, sweetie, the date we set is only a week away. There's no way-"

"We'll make a way." There was that gleam in his eyes now, one that had Bucky's heart sinking low and doing flips in his chest at the same time. Steve was furiously scribbling on the back of one of the cancellation notices, and when Bucky leaned over, he saw that it was a checklist.

"You." Steve shoved a piece of paper at his chest. "Go here and pick up a couple of rings. As cheap as possible. Don't mention the w-word."

Bucky stumbled back, looking down at the chicken-scratch in his hands. It wasn't between their apartment and the church. Steve must have found a jeweler beforehand. He opened his mouth to ask Steve about it but clicked it shut when he noticed that the flush on Steve's cheeks was as much from excitement as it was from rage. ~~Goddamnit he was so soft for this man.~~

Glancing back at the address, Bucky let out a sigh and reached for his wallet. It wasn't too far away. He'd just have to go along with it until Steve got over it.

\---

Steve didn't get over it because of course he didn't. Bucky was sent on trips all over the city to pick up their suits, look for venues, and even talk to the priest. Father Lantom was delighted to have another wedding so soon because of course the one time in his life Steve needed to be stopped, the universe was not out to thwart him at every turn.

He'd even found a photographer on short notice, a cheeky young man with wild brown hair and a surprisingly strong handshake. Bucky had never heard of him, but apparently, he took good photos for the Daily Bugle, and Bucky wasn't about to look a gift horse in the mouth.

Then Rebecca Barnes Proctor found out because of course she did, and insisted that she and the Barnes family would handle the food. George and Winnifred had apparently despaired that their womanizing son would ever settle down with someone and were ecstatic both because it was Steve and because now they had a chance to make tons of plum crumbs for Bucky's wedding. He'd tried to explain that weddings didn't work that way, but the Barnes' couldn't be dissuaded (of course), and Steve looked so pleased with himself Bucky couldn't bear to ruin it.

Their MC and DJ was another cheeky brunet, and Bucky himself had despaired when he noticed the walkman on his belt, but Steve assured him he knew what he was doing. Apparently, the guy was the leader of some obscure band that were the only ones willing to put on a performance in only a couple of days. Given the strange descriptions of the members, Bucky wondered if it was all some elaborate scam, before deciding that the amount of money involved was not enough to make it worth investigating.

Then it was time to write the speeches, and Bucky sat down at the same desk in which he had written cancellation notices only a few days ago, and stared at the blank piece of paper. The Barnes' had probably already written theirs, as enthused as they were, and his best (wo)man, Natasha from work, had smirked in that mysterious way of hers that meant she'd probably started writing the moment he'd met her. That still left Bucky though, and it felt like the words were rushing to get out of his head, but when he reached for them there was nothing there at all.

Still, there was something that he had to get off of his chest, that had been gnawing at the back of his head ever since he came up with the crazy idea at Steve's bedside. Taking a deep breath, Bucky set his pen to the paper and began to write.

\---

"Dearly beloved," Father Lanthom intoned.

"You have come together into the house of the Church so that in the presence of the Church’s minister and the community your intention to enter into Marriage may be strengthened by the Lord with a sacred seal. Christ abundantly blesses the love that binds you. Through a special Sacrament, he enriches and strengthens those he has already consecrated by Holy Baptism, that they may. Steven Grant Rogers and James Buchanan Barnes, have you come here to enter into Marriage without coercion, freely and wholeheartedly?"

Bucky felt butterflies flutter out of his throat at the m-word. "I have," he and Steve said together.

"Are you prepared, as you follow the path of Marriage, to love and honor each other for as long as you both shall live?"

"I am."

"Since it is your intention to enter the covenant of Holy Matrimony, join your right hands, and declare your consent before God and his Church."

Bucky took a deep breath, grabbing Steve's hand and feeling a reassuring squeeze in return. "I, James Buchanan Barnes, take you, Steven Grant Rogers, to be my husband. I promise to be faithful to you, in good times and in bad, in sickness and in health, to love you and to honor you all the days of my life."

"I, Steven Grant Rogers, take you, James Buchanan Barnes, to be my husband. I promise to be faithful to you, in good times and in bad, in sickness and in health, to love you and to honor you all the days of my life."

Bucky looked up and saw that Father Lanthom was smiling. "May the Lord in his kindness strengthen the consent you have declared before the Church and graciously bring to fulfillment his blessings within you. What God has joined, let no one put asunder. May the God of Abraham, the God of Isaac, the God of Jacob, the God who joined together our first parents in paradise, strength and bless in Christ the consent you have declared before the Church, so that what God joins together, no one may put asunder. Let us bless the Lord."

"Thanks be to God," those gathered in the church said.

Father Lanthom then turned to the rings on the cushion, and not for the first time, Bucky internally winced at the shoddy quality. "May the Lord bless these rings, which you will give to each other as the sign of your love and fidelity."

"Amen."

The priest sprinkled the rings with holy water and handed them over to the couple. Bucky lifted his trembling hand and gave Steve a weak smile as he slid the ring onto his finger.

"James, receive this ring as a sign of my love and fidelity. In the name of the Father, and of the Son, and of the Holy Spirit."

"Steven, receive this ring as a sign of my love and fidelity. In the name of the Father, and of the Son, and of the Holy Spirit."

The words had only just left his lips before Steve was crashing into them, pulling Bucky in close by the tie. Bucky sighed into the kiss, wrapping his arms around Steve's waist and letting everything else fall away. The ring felt heavy on his hand, and Bucky thumbed the reminder of the love of his life absent-mindedly. He was so ready for this to be the rest of his life.

\---

Bucky choked on his crumb when he noticed two figures making their way through the dining hall to the front table. Steve got up to bow, but the Wakandan King just waved him back down.

"No need for that, please. It is just T'Challa and Shuri here. I have come to offer my congratulations to you both. Thank you for allowing us to celebrate this day with you."

Bucky was still conspicuously coughing his lungs out, so Steve bit the bullet and asked the question. "So, um, your ma-T'Challa, why did you decide to come?"

He looked sheepish. And wasn't that a sight to see, the richest man in the world looking sheepish at two nobodies' wedding. "It was not my original intention to attend. I mean no offense, but I still have no idea who you are. However, my dear sister was extremely eager to see this wedding for herself, and I'm afraid what Shuri wants, Shuri gets, 99% of the time."

Bucky felt his eyes stray to the chirpy girl in the red sleeveless dress that seemed to be deep in conversation with the photographer. She glanced over, and, noticing that Bucky was staring, gave him a wink and a thumbs up. Bucky felt blood rush to his face when he realized he and Steve's lives had probably just been closely scrutinized by a teenage girl halfway across the world.

Steve let out a strangled laugh, probably feeling like an ant under a magnifying glass himself, and said, "Well, thanks for coming anyway. And for the, uh, gifts."

On the table, there was a lavish display of items, from a set of carefully crafted and embellished silverware to a pair of bracelets made out of beads that seemed to be able to display pictures, make calls, tell the time, and otherwise behave like a smartphone. Shuri had pointed it out to them beforehand, citing a need to "one-up" the Starkphone to prove that she was the better inventor. Bucky just felt dizzy from the sheer combined value of the objects in the pile.

Stark had, predictably, sent another Starkmobile, and Reed Richards had provided a set of plasma knives that Bucky was only hesitant about accepting because he had the feeling they would blow up if he was not careful. ("Nonsense," Reed had said, "they're just modern knives for modern times." Bucky had nodded and accepted the sage wisdom. After all, knives were knives, and Bucky was drawn to them like a vulture to a carcass.)

Charles Xavier had sent a collection of various spices that Bucky couldn't pronounce, but he was eager to try cooking with them (Steve carefully turned his head before grimacing and bracing himself for a month of "experimental" dishes. Norman Osborne's gift was a fully stocked grooming kit, Emma Frost had given them a king-sized set of Egyptian cotton bed sheets. Steve had to pull Bucky away from rubbing his face on all of it, but he was just too glad that Steve would get the softest, most luxurious experience possible (in more ways than one).

There were a few bottles of alcohol and some crystal wine glasses from some Scandinavian prince named after Norse mythology, but Bucky got woozy just smelling it from outside the closed bottle, so he figured it would be best saved for an occasion he _really_ didn't want to remember. Or wake up from.

Unfortunately, Doctor Doom's present was a boatload of Doom Bots, but luckily for them, the Black Panther appeared and was able to send them packing. It seemed the Wakandan guardian was always there to protect his king and princess, even if he had to hide in the shadows of a wedding, of all places. Bucky shuddered to think what would have happened if he'd rejected them by canceling the wedding like he'd planned, and resolved to never mess with royalty again.

The agents of SHIELD had pitched their funds together to buy them an antique clock, although Bucky suspected hidden cameras and would have to take it apart before he would let it be installed in their new home. Peeking in on them was totally Fury's style, but Bucky wasn't having any of it from his boss. The Howlies had similarly pitched their funds together, but they had bought a set of silicone dildos and a bag of bottles of lube. Peggy had cheerfully pointed out her recommendations while Bucky laughed and Steve slowly died of embarrassment.

Now, sitting at a dinner table with Steve on one side and Natasha on another, another table piled high with fancy gifts from friend and stranger alike, Bucky let his inner cat purr contentedly. This was the life. He took another piece of chicken for his plate and grinned at Peggy, who was getting up on the other side of Steve to give a best man speech. She grinned back before beginning to verbally roast them alive.

\---

Bucky cleared his throat, feeling his hands start to grow slick from sweat. The paper was crinkling from him holding it too tightly, but relaxing took more mental capacity than he had at the moment. It wasn't like everyone's eyes were on him; in fact, a good portion of the audience was busy digging into the cake. Still, it felt like even the moon and stars had turned their attention from the rest of the universe to focus on Bucky with pinpoint accuracy.

Suddenly, a hand clutched his pant leg, and Bucky looked down to see Steve give him a reassuring nod. Nodding back, Bucky stood up straight and forced his voice to come out of his throat. It was the last speech of the day. Just a little longer, and they could go home and properly celebrate their wedding night.

"So, uh, you may- you probably don't know me, but I'm Bucky. Huh. May be the first time someone's had to introduce themselves at their wedding." A few giggles, but mostly silence. "Anyways, thank you to everyone who's here for coming, I'm so glad you've come. Really. Well, actually, when we got the first RSVP from his royal majesty King T'Challa, I was- not glad." This time a murmur swept through the crowd and Bucky spotted Steve looking concerned while Natasha face-palmed.

"To be completely honest, initially this wedding was going to be- to be fake, and we were going to make off with the wedding presents-" Now Rebecca and Peggy were face-palming as well, and Bucky didn't dare turn to see his parents' expressions. "-but I think between then and now, I realized that I... I did want us to get married. For real. And not just for the presents."

Letting out a shaky breath, Bucky turned to look Steve in the eye. "I love you, Steven Grant Rogers-Barnes (wow that is a mouthful). I've loved you ever since you punched me in the face for hitting on Peggy and not going down when she punched me the first time." Both of them blushed at the memory. "I fell even more in love with you every time you stood up to jerks twice your size or volunteered at FEAST or joined the march for this or that. I fell in love all over again every time you drew me drooling in my sleep or insisted on going out even when you were sick or even every time you smiled."

Bucky could hear a few sniffles now, but he couldn't stop to think or else the water in his eyes would spill over and he'd be a blubbering mess before he could finish. And this was Important. "You're the bravest, most selfless, most determined man I've ever known, and I'm-" Bucky felt the hitch in his breath before he could suppress it "-I'm so so so so so so happy that I get to marry you, you punk." There were tears streaming down his cheeks now, and he sloppily wiped them away with his sleeve so he could see the rest of his paper.

"I know your mother would be so proud to see the man you've become, and I'm so grateful to her for raising such a wonderful person. I'll do my best to make her proud too, and treat you right." Steve was crying now too, a few exasperated laughs slipping through. Bucky continued. "I'm so grateful for you too, ma, pa, for taking care of me and Steve all these years and so patiently waiting for me to get my head out of my ass. I love you so much."

He turned to the other side of the table to face his coworkers, Natasha patting Clint's head as he bawled into her chest ~~her own face was wet~~. "I'm so grateful for you jerks too, for being there for me when I needed it most and even when I didn't. Without you, I wouldn't be the man I am today, standing here in the happiest moment of my life.

"And of course thank you so much to our photographer, Peter Parker, who has asked that I, uh, share his twitter: @spideyboi420 where you can commission him for editorials, events like these, or- Peter!" Said photographer just giggled and waved. Bucky sighed, the atmosphere sufficiently lightened. "Thank you to the wonderful Guardians-" He doubled back and reread the line, but it stubbornly remained the same. "-the, er, Guardians of the Groove for providing the music for tonight." one of the members did a quick riff on the guitar, and Bucky felt himself internally give up on trying to make sense of this day.

"Thank you to the wonderful staff of the Empire Banquet Hall for hosting us today, and Father Lanthom for conducting the ceremony. Now, without any further ado, let's dance!"

A cheer went up, and Bucky was almost swept off his feet as Steve dragged them to the dance floor. Bucky felt drunk from the sheer joy radiating off his husband (husband!! husband!!!) and leaned in to press his lips to Steve's. He'd never felt more alive.

**Author's Note:**

> Constructive criticism welcome! Seriously, I'm not Catholic, never been married, I have no idea how good that wedding was.


End file.
